how I accidentally ate octopus

I'm not a picky eater. I'll basically try anything once, with the exception of veal, which I think is disgustingly horrendous. I've tried to go vegetarian multiple times, but In n Out Burger kept pulling me back into the omnivorous world. Arizona doesn't have an outstanding selection of different types of cuisine, but I try to get a little adventurous when ordering food in other places. Like I said in an earlier post, I ate shark the first night I was here, and last summer I had fish gut soup in Chinatown. The shark was delicious and I never want to taste, look at, or think of fish gut soup again.

Tonight, my aunt, uncle, and I went to a tapas restaurant. Having taken six years of Spanish, you'd think I would have eaten tapas somewhere along the line, but I hadn't. The menu was quite extensive, with lots of different meats, cheeses, and seafood. We ended up ordering a bunch of different things and sharing them all. One of the things on the menu was a dish called "feisty potatoes". I laughed at the name multiple times, including when my uncle ordered them. At the last minute, he changed the order to a different type of potatoes. We also ordered some shrimp, spinach, duck (I'd never tried that before either- yum), calamari, and an octopus potato salad. I'd tried calamari in Chinatown last summer, I had really liked it but couldn't get over the fact that I was eating tiny squid. I was ready to conquer anything, except I was slightly iffy on the octopus.

Octopuses (dictionary.com says the plural can be octopuses or octopi) are gross. They're slimy and gelatinous. They're cool to look at in aquariums, and there was that one that always predicted the winner of the World Cup, but usually after looking at one for a few seconds I get the chills and have to walk away. They're just too blobby and their tentacles are creepy. Like, those things can stick to you and then you have this clammy growth just hanging on your arm. I don't enjoy the thought of octopi. So, when my uncle ordered this thing as FOOD, I was highly skeptic.

The waitress brought out the plates, and I started sampling everything. My aunt had ordered this one dipping sauce that was so good I ate like five pieces of bread slathered in it. I started spooning the dishes onto my plate, and reached for the potato dish. The potatoes were piled on the serving platter and sprinkled with a heavy dose of paprika. I poured them onto my plate, gathering an excessive amount of the thinner, more purple-looking pieces. Forgetting that my uncle had changed the order at the last minute, I figured these were the infamous "feisty potatoes". I speared a purple slice with my fork and eagerly took a bite. My first thought was "Hm, what great spices", my second thought was, "Why does it feel like I'm chewing on an eraser?" And then, it hit me.

I WAS EATING THE OCTOPUS.

I knew I couldn't make a scene at this hip tapas bar. I had to finish the piece of cephalopod. I pushed the thought of octopus to the very back of my mind and tried to think about feisty potatoes. After chewing on what was basically a solid piece of rubber for what seemed like an eternity, the octopus was gone. I looked closer at my plate, the skinny purple pieces were NOT potatoes. I couldn't believe what I had just put in my mouth, and I tried to convince myself it hadn't happened. Maybe it was just an overcooked feisty potato. Nervously pushing the purple pieces around with my fork, I managed to squeak "What is this?". My uncle glanced over and told me in a very non-chalant manner that it was the octopus. My worst fear was confirmed. I ate the octopus.

I'm going to go brush my teeth again.

cheers,

lauren