a day of epiphanies

do you ever have those moments when you suddenly have a thought and you just think it's the best idea in the entire world & everyone should know about it? today I was walking around asu, where it was only about 100 degrees, but still felt so unbelievably hot that I was walking 5 times slower than I really should have been. then I remembered that in boston they have these little tunnels that go under the schools that really come in handy when it's snowing &  negative 3472 degrees outside. so, why can't arizona state have these tunnels? AIR CONDITIONED TUNNELS THAT GO UNDER THE SCHOOL WHERE YOU CAN ESCAPE THE HEAT BUT STILL GET TO CLASS. why not?! of course, asu being the great little place it is only costs an arm and a leg, and air conditioning these little tunnels would cost them a hefty penny, but why not just charge an arm, leg, and first born child to fund these tunnels? then no more sunburn, dehydration, or melted shoes. brilliant?!

I'm sure you've also noticed that there are a lot of people on the road, not only in Arizona but everywhere, that should not have a driver's license or even a high school diploma. blatantly, these people are dumb. they drive 30 mph on the freeway, stop 800 feet before a stop light, leave their blinker on for fifteen minutes after they merge. it's ANNOYING and obviously dangerous. so, you know that nifty little test we all have to pass to get our license that basically only requires us to know how to spell our names and start a car? why not add a little IQ test to this license test so we can ensure that the people populating our roads are not entirely inept. yes?

other epiphanies I had today include that I should not eat two chocolate chip waffles smothered in syrup for breakfast because although they're full of sugar, my body, which is used to healthy foods, will be destined to crash from low blood sugar. this will only force me to dash out of my italian class and run across campus to jamba juice where I have a small episode concerning a pretzel. episode as follows:

me: Can I have a sixteen ounce razzmatazz with a soy protein boost, and also one of those cinnamon apple pretzels?

jamba man: sure. do you want that pretzel heated up?

me (clearly very pale and shaking so badly I can barely open my wallet): no thank you, I just want it now.

jamba man: are you sure? we can heat it up.

me: no, I just want it now.

jamba man: okay, but I can heat it up. [jamba man walks away, leaving me at the register, pretzeless]

jamba lady ( taking wrapper off straw and putting it in my smoothie at painstakingly slow pace): razzmatazz for lauren

me (quickly grabbing smoothie and drinking for 3 straight minutes): THANK YOU 

[jamba man continues to meander around behind the counter as I stare at the pretzels in their case. jamba man slowly realizes I need my pretzel. He opens the wrong door to the pretzel case twice, then finally reaches in the get the pretzel.]

jamba man: are you sure you don't want this heated up?

me: no, thank you

jamba man: are you sure? it's kind of cold.

me (getting frustrated): i'm sure.

jamba man: I can heat it up really quick right here.

me: I JUST WANT THE PRETZEL

[I rush out of jamba juice and realize the pretzel is almost frozen solid. sweet.]

I also had another epiphany today, but the pretzel story took a lot out of me so I can't remember what it was. yay for two jersey shores this week!!

cheers,

lauren

for your information

There are a few things that all my friends know about me and since you are reading this, I guess I consider you a good friend. So if you want to make it official and all, you should remember this. I love the Olympics. I have anyways watched the Olympics, I was shocked to find out that some people didn't, but somewhere along all the times that I have watched them, something clicked, and they became my first true love. As anyone would know that has seen me during the weeks that the Olympics take place, I am a complete mess. All I think about is when I am going to get home so I don't miss a specific sport or if the US is going to win, or the cute Canadian. I was a total wreck during every single one of Michael Phelps' races, I was pretty much completely devoted to him freshman year. Even after, I still was. Sophomore year I referenced him in my AIMS writing (I exceeded!!). I know all the athletes, I know who won, by how much and who got thrown out. By the end of those 2 or 3 weeks, I am exhausted and on the verge of a panic attack. After the closing ceremony everyone I know breathes a much needed sigh of relief, me included.

Another thing is I am in love with Australian guys. I am also perfectly okay with them being British or Canadian, you know as long as they're in the commonwealth. I'm also not sure where this love sprang up from, but it might have something to do with this guy.

let me explain. I first saw Jesse Spencer in Winning London, my absolute favorite Mary Kate & Ashley movie (besides Our Lips Are Sealed, where they are actually in Australia, but honestly the guys weren't quite as hot and I never owned that one). He was playing a british guy but with a little research I found out he was actually australian. He is gorgeous and his beautiful accent made me love him even more. I saw him again a few years later in House. His lovely-ness was the only way I could suffer through that atrocious television series. Then he was in Uptown Girls, which is one of the main reasons that movie landed in my top 5 chick flicks (there are really only 5 that I actually like though). I also like that movie because my incessant singing of the sheets of egyptian cotton song prompted my mother to buy me egyptian cotton sheets, which are FANTASTIC! Anyway ever since I have had a deep love for little australian/ british boys i.e. Prince William, who will be pleased to know that I am closely following his wedding details and totally plan to crash it. You should also know that I hate googling people, so just finding that picture up there was quite a stretch for me, but you really needed to see it.
Now you are probably wondering why I have such intense obsessions with said things. Well it is because I am easily persuaded to become obsessed with things. I mean you already know that my sister and I (cayla) are both totally obsessed with The Buried Life (canadian!!), Adam Young and Andrew Mcmahon. You might also have observed, by my lack of an oxford comma, that I now love Vampire Weekend and even more surprising, John Mayer. I am obviously obsessed with Apolo (who you should know is named after Apolo Ohno, Olympic speed skater, although I wanted to name her after JR Celski who was totally hot, but not Australian) but more recently I have become obsessed with two things. Spanish music and Colonial House. I got a CD of Spanish music from the old spanish teacher, so that explains that, but I should probably explain Colonial House. It is a reality show where modern day people go and live like in Colonial times. In other words, it the most awesome, drama filled television series you will ever watch in history class. It's like Jersey Shore but like 400 years ago. There are also 2 hot British guys, which only make it better.

blue & white, see them? it's the british ones, ignore the guy with the crazy beard and the other creeper in the background who went skinny dipping with his wife...and his son. I told you, drama.
So with that little snapshot of my current life and carpel tunnel looming in the distance, I will close this out with a few more key things about me. I love watching movies and I can pretty much quote every movie I've ever seen in everyday situations. (I can pretty much recite Monty Python and the Holy Grail) I tell long winded, confusing stories multiple times because I can never remember if I've told them before or if I forgot a major detail. I love reading books, especially good ones like Sherlock Holmes and ones by Mo Willems, who writes the books about pigeons driving buses. I go to a lot of concerts, but not so many anymore because I think I am losing my hearing. I love writing, and if you've made it all the way through my little novel you will know that now too.
I also love talking about myself.
hahahaha

cheers,
cayla
p.s. this computer is an idiot

no words:

cheers,

lauren & cayla

a lesson in romantics

over the past five days i've been to three concerts, aka i'm barely clinging to life. sydney and i saw dierks bentely (and chingy, who doesn't count) at asu for free, which was our first country concert and very enjoyable. although i only knew about two songs, he was good and we didn't have to pay. the next night was owl city and john mayer, which, as already discussed, was epic. then last night was something corporate, which there are no words to describe. it was the fifth anniversary of andrew's stem cell transplant, they were doing shots on stage, i have never seen anyone happier to be alive then those five boys. i could pull up the little thesaurus on my computer, but like i just said, there aren't any words that would do them justice. but, unlike the title suggests i did not see mayday parade, nor have i listened to them in probably a good two years. what i'm trying to say is that it's hard to listen to andrew croon konstantine while looking so in love or john mayer sing anything while you're upset. the little pieces of your broken heart start to press up against your chest and make it really uncomfortable. how's that imagery? thankfully these shows all pushed into one sleepless week have helped me realize a few things and hopefully left me for the better. that's all i'll say about that so that cayla our resident cynic doesn't get too upset.

i started school last week, and so far i still possess no motivation to do anything. i've been logging in and out of my online classes to make it look like i'm doing something. that little bird is still living in our backyard, we named him enrique. i'm going to go make some tea some hopefully i'll have a hint of a voice by the time i have to go to work today.

it's not hard to dream, you'll always be my Konstantine.

cheers,

lauren

#25

DANCE WILDLY IN A PUBLIC PLACE

yessssssssssss. so here's the deal:

owl city comes with john mayer. cayla, jaclyn and i (lauren) get to cricket wireless pavilion averagely 45 minutes before the concert starts due to getting stuck in a ton of traffic on the I-10. after kicking some butt and taking some names, we get the PERFECT seat on the lawn with a straight-on view of the stage even though we're still 234532 feet away from it. little did we know we had just stretched out our woodstock-themed picnic blanket in hardcore john mayer country. no one within a 10 mile radius (yes that's how big this place is) of us had any interest, or had probably even heard of owl city. so needless to say when our little baby adam came on stage we completely lost it and had to sing and scream so he knows we're back there showing him some love. everyone around was completely 100% stone silent. then we decide that flailing our arms about on our little blanket is still not enough, so jaclyn suggests that during the little breakdown of the song 'tip of the iceberg' we jump up and go completely crazy. and so we did. for the approximate 45 seconds that the music break lasts, we danced so wildly that the people sitting behind us left to find new seats. only until after owl city was over did we turn around and realize how many people were really surrounding us and witnessed our dance show, but it was so worth it. you may think that dancing wildly at a concert would not count for this, but when everyone else is checking their phones or making shapes out of the grass blades on their blankets, we definitely stood out. it was sweet! it'll have to happen again, we love you little adam.

needless to say john mayer came on next and blew us all away. cayla and i have never been jm fans because we think that he loves himself just a little too much, but after seeing him perform live we quickly signed ourselves up for the cult of mayerism. the show was amazing, we danced a little more, and harassed the two kids in front of us that swore they "weren't a couple" even though the girl was so into him & he kept trying to inch away from her. sad. and yes we even cried a little bit because somehow john mayer is a mind reader and knew exactly what jaclyn and i needed to but didn't want to hear. it was a night to remember and the most fabulously perfect way to end the summer. again again!

cheers,

lauren, cayla, & jaclyn

p.s. hi it's cayla and i'm going to marry john mayer's saxophone player, just so you know.

#66: crime scene, do not cross

so about a million years ago, we crossed "be a csi" off of our list, but we never posted the story, mostly because we never got the pictures off the camera, but also because we forgot. but I just remembered and found the picture so now I will tell you about it.

We got a letter in the mail and it was addressed to VANDY. I am not Vandy, no one in my family is Vandy and I don't know anyone who goes by that name, so we were all a little confused. Lauren and I (Cayla) decided that it would be a good idea to do some investigating. We googled the guy in the return address to make sure he was not a terrorist sending us anthrax, then steamed open the letter (of course after googling how to steam open a letter). 

so of course I look like an idiot in this picture, but it is the only one I could find and I figured you should see it.

We finally got it open after like 20 minutes and it was a birthday card drawn by a little kid with parent -writtten sticky notes letting us know that the vertical lines were trees and the horizontal lines were birds. Which draws the deeper question: Who is Vandy? Why is this little kid making him a birthday card and why doesn't the mom think I can figure out little kid drawings? Well I guess we'll do a little more research into it, but we have decided that it was worthy to cross off our list!

Owl City is on Wednesday and Something Corporate is on Sunday, let the obsessed fan-girl stalking begin.

Cheers,

Cayla

early birdie

i finally rolled out of bed this morning, and, after giving pebble an acceptable amount of scratchies, decided it was a good day for a pumpkin spice latte. fortunately i have about 6 boxes of pumpkin spice mix for my little single-cup coffee maker that was originally intended for my dorm room, so i was in good shape. as i was stirring a little sugar into the coffee, which i just noticed needs a little more, i looked out the window to see this little guy.

it's so tiny!! what a cute little baby, huh? i just checked and he's still back there and apparently doesn't want anyone by this plant. he keeps chasing off this especially curious red headed bird. i guess i should stop drinking coffee and birdwatching since i'm supposed to be cleaning my dad's house today. 

tiny birds > cleaning supplies.

cheers, 

lauren

p.s. hey it's cayla (again) and we named the bird enrique and he lives in a tiny nest in our front yard, he as a friend named snooki, i think they're in love